What are Needs?

(35 Minutes)

  • Have your students watch the video on underlying needs and then the example videos.

Example 1

Example 2

Example 3

  • Have students read the following article on Underlying Needs and give them the Underlying Needs handout. 


  • Have students go through the game matching examples with underlying needs

Iceberg Model

(30 minutes)

  • Show the students the Iceberg Model video.

by WJC

  • Give students the Iceberg Model handout. Discuss strategies, positions, and interests in relation to needs.


  • Have students write out a full conflict scenario, real or imaginary. Have students note the positions, needs, interests, and strategies that are part of this conflict.

Meeting Needs

(50 minutes)

  • Have students read the article on Techniques for Addressing Underlying Interests and Needs.
  • Have students analyze one of their own conflicts with a partner using the worksheet.
  •  Teach your students to use an I-Message to let others know what they need in a conflict situation.  They can use the formula: I feel _____ when _______ because I need ______.  Would you (or) Can we __________?
    Example: I feel irritated when I'm left waiting to be picked up without any message because I need to be able to rely on my ride.  Would you please be on time next time or let me know by text if you're going to be late?
  • Have your students practice saying I-Messages with one another.

Move on to Level IV: Emotions, Regulation Strategies